The Mystique Behind the Peach: Emmeline Peaches and Me

Hello my lovely readers!

So, in case y’all didn’t know yet, I’ve recently started dating the gorgeous Theia in addition to my ever-dashing Mr Peaches. 

Among many other things, Theia is unbelievably kind and sweet beyond belief. So much so that she took the time to write this piece about me. 

I am the worst when it comes to complements. Never known how to take them, as I always feel rather undeserving, but I will allow Theia’s words to exist on my site with grace, knowing that someone I love so much thinks such generous things about me. 

Time to hand things over.


Hi There,

I’m Theia, Emmeline’s other third.

Emmeline has been encouraging me to write more, so I thought I would make her the subject of my first pondering. In this article I’m going to share some things I have discovered about my fruity lady (which you may or may not know) from my perspective, to get to the peaches pip as it were.

I hope you find this a fun and insightful read into the world of Emmeline as viewed by her partner:

Emmeline is strong. I’m not talking about the physical way (though, she is, as she describes, ‘buff’). For a soft fleshed fruit, she is able to bounce back from a variety of things. Much like Mangle, her favourite Five Nights At Freddy’s character, (but more on that later) she’ll always put herself back together. My peach has been through a lot, but each time she learns and grows, and I think that is such an amazing thing.

Emmeline can sleep anywhere, and seemingly at any time. As I write this I see Emmeline curled up on the sofa, blanket and Mangle plush (I promise more on that!) with her Peachy Pooch, Rooney, curled up lovingly into her back. This is quite the adorable trait, albeit from time to time humorous. She can literally nod off with Markiplier screaming in one of his horror vids.

Am I officially weird yet? #TeddyLove

A post shared by Emmeline Peaches (@emmelinepeaches) on

There have been several occasions where I’ve been speaking to Emmeline about a Youtube vid (another Emmeline factoid) and it is only upon finishing my point and looking up, that I notice she has been asleep (probably for some time). I’ll then smile to myself, make sure she has a blanket, and allow her to rest, although not too much, as Ms Peaches sadly has a penchant for migraines.

Emmeline (and I) LOVE Five Nights at Freddy’s (FNAF), we’ve seen Markiplier’s ‘Let’s Plays’ twice over together, and have been working our way through Jacksepticeye’s play through. We watch theory videos from Treesicle and game theories, in short, we’re obsessive nerds.

Emmeline recently treated me to a copy of ‘The Silver Eyes’ and I felt so treated! I’ve been reading it intensely and I’m quite sad I’m near its end. As I mentioned, Emmelines favourite characters are Mangle (also known as Funtime Foxy) and Foxy.

She has a giant Mangle Plush, which, no doubt you’ve seen on Instagram, and a small collection shelf of foxy and Mangle goodies. I’ve crafted several FNAF items for her, and maybe one day, if you ask nicely, she might show you. (Also, if you’re curious, my favourite character is Ballora).

Emmeline is one of the most caring fruits you’ll find in fruit bowl. When encountering people in day to day life, Emmeline will often compliment them and will always say ‘thank you, have a lovely day’ to everyone from, clerks to cabbies. This is a charming feature of my peach, and people are often surprised, and typically left smiling after an encounter with her.

Emmeline also has more than enough love to give to animals, who receive her undying love and excellent care. Yes, at times accidents may happen (Emmeline will know what I mean on this) but, the overarching impression of Emmeline as a pet owner is a devoted, loyal and giving individual, whether it be  to a wormy or a doggo.

My sweet peach will even visit the pet shop to show its critters some love until they find their forever home. This can at times lead to heavy attachment, however, going back to my first point, my lady is more than strong enough to take it as a reality of life.

Emmeline has an adorably unique approach to games. Her pacifism extends to table top gaming and card games. For example, when playing magic against my peachy foe, she will not attack unless you attack her, and even then only to even the score. This makes for an interesting gaming experience I have to say!

Another factoid about Emmeline involves Cards Against Humanity. This game is the only exception to the rule, as the soft squishy peach reveals its hard stone. There have been some glorious plays from my lady, and also some wonderful moments.

My advice to any of you reading: If by some chance you find yourself in a room with Emmeline, playing CAH, is to arm yourself with one of two cards: The first being, ‘a micro pig in a raincoat and booties’ to which your precious peach will squeal and automatically declare you winner. The trump card however, is ‘a tiny horse’ to which you will find yourself confronted with a squealing, crying mess.

Emmeline loves holding hands with me in public. This is very endearing to me, and makes me puff my chest out in pride and stride out. I remember when I first held hands with a woman in public, and I remember the feeling, and seeing her experiencing them with a big grin on her face warms my heart.

Emmeline loves a good coffee shop. We have a location we frequent on dates, but there are also numerous visits to Coffee #1, and she’s always peachy keen on finding new and ethical locations for a brew.

Typically Emmeline opts for herbal teas. Sometimes she’ll experiment and sometimes she’ll go for something simple and fruity. Me on the other hand, if there’s something ridonkculously unhealthy, salted caramel, or a giant milkshake, I’m there.

First date with my new partner 💞💖 #Polyamory #PolyPartner

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Emmeline’s a Youtube addict, like myself. Typically you can find her curled up on the sofa watching film reviews or criticism, normally on god awful movies. When I’m not around Emmeline loves a creepypasta or two, but shes kind enough to not watch them around me. Together we tend to watch through Let’s Plays or take it in turns to choose vids. We tend to use Youtube as a way to show each other our worlds.

You’ve probably already noticed this but Emmeline’s .gif game is strong. In our Facebook conversations, we’ll often have entire chats just in .gifs, each seeking to out-do each other. I like to think I win, but if I’m honest it’s a close draw.

Emmeline is my angel and goddess, and I love her very much.

So there you have it; Ten facts about Emmeline Peaches from the perspective of her other third. I hope you enjoyed this clandestine snap shot, and you may hear from me again soon!

Theia.