When Pinocchio was singing about the liberating element of having ‘no strings’ he probably didn’t know just how pertinent his song was for some (at least I hope he didn’t).
Relationships are wonderful and they have many benefits, but they also cater to a very specific kind of emotional/romantic/physical commitment that not everyone is seeking. We all have different desires in life, and the thrill and freedom of meeting up purely for sex is exactly what some people need.
Of course there has been a huge backlash against ‘hookup’ culture and anti-sex approaches have been quick to label anyone who decides to explore no-strings attached sex with various derogatory terms, but boo to that! Strictly-sex hookups are a completely valid form of sexual exploration and, when practiced with a fully informed and consenting partner (or partners, depending on your preferences). Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
In fact, the next time someone tried to yuck your yum consider going the extra mile and telling them about the multiple benefits of strictly-sex based hookups. Benefits such as…
Knowing Exactly Where You Stand
Dating is thrilling but it also often comes with a lot of uncertainty. Everyone involved is just a tad apprehensive and worried about different aspects of their future and how well each other’s lives may or may not eventually mesh together. Some might even be meeting up just for a hookup only to find that the individual they’ve been talking to wants more.
With hookups that are arranged specifically for sex both of you know exactly what you want and you have a clear idea of how your needs can be met. There is no additional expectations, no emotional pressure (beyond the support provided during the sex session itself), and no second-guessing where things will lead to afterwards. You met for sex. It’s that simple.
Becoming A More Confident Individual
And, let’s face it—when meeting for a hookup you typically want to make sure that everyone involved is getting exactly what they want out of the fuck at hand. No one can promise a perfect evening (and consent can always be withdrawn or mutually renegotiated) but most typically go in to a strictly-sex hookup with clear intentions.
This usually means that you don’t mess around when it comes to the messaging stage. When you contact people you tell them exactly what your preferences are, what your fetishes might be, and what you’re looking for from the meeting.
This sense of direct communication is a brilliant skill which grows your overall self-confidence and leaves you feeling more assertive and appreciated for your stance.
Of course not everyone will respond well to what you have to say, but you’ll soon learn that’s fine, adding to the sense of self-assurance that strictly sex hookups can bring. You do you and let the world see just how fierce you can be.
Gaining A Keen Understanding of Consent
Consent is applicable in all aspects of life, but it is most noticeable (and crucial) when it comes to actions such as sex.
As part of your sexual negotiations chances are that you’ll learn to become incredibly aware about consent, how different people approach it, and exactly what it means to you.
You’ll understand that consent is fluid, and that what yourself (or someone else) initially thought would be a good idea might not be so fantastic in action. You’ll also learn the bliss of being able to loudly and clearly shout “Yes! More. MORE!” when your hookup pushes exactly the right button.
If hooking up with many different individuals you may also even find fun new ways to play with consent and gain an appreciation of its more nuanced aspects. ‘Safe words’ are just the tip of the iceberg. Consent is mandatory, sexy, and comes in all different forms, and you’ll soon become a consent master.
Learning To Negotiate
You want to hookup but the person in your area isn’t into the exact same thing as you. Do you ditch the prospect altogether or do you try to find a compromise?
The answer is ultimately up to you but the point is that strictly-sex hookups will allow you a perfect change to flex those negotiation muscles and learn how to become a highly competent communicator. It will give you a chance to see where the boundaries lie for you and to figure out how you work around them (or not) with the various people that you encounter (either online or in person).
As with all of the points listed so far, this skill will also have incredibly positive applications in other walks of life. Just think about it: Confident. A good communicator. Capable of considered negotiation. Aware of other’s comfort zones. Strictly-sex hookups could basically go on your CV! (If our nation wasn’t so outwardly prudish, that is).
Allowing You To Try New Things
Have a fetish that you’ve always been fascinated with but never had a chance to try while in a relationship? Or perhaps you’re rather vanilla in your usual sexual exchanges but want to learn first-hand what the world has to offer when it comes to desire?
Strictly-sex hookups allow you to meet an array of different people, each with their own kinks and sexual character which will allow you to explore a huge variety of sexual preferences.
What’s better is that you can literally dip your toe in to any fetish that you decide to try. Want to have a go at sploshing? Go find someone to share your coffee cake with. Always loved pet names? Why not become someone’s good little pup/kitten/bun-bun for the day?
Throughout these experiences you’ll be able to discover what does and doesn’t work for you and take your sexual exploration as far as you’re comfortable with.
And, as an added bonus, if you do find a fetish that you really like through a fellow no-strings enthusiast then you’ve also got the perfect go-to for scratching that particular itch should the need emerge.
Fostering Sex (And Body) Positivity
This one is a big one and I think it matters so much.
Mainstream media is so critical of many different aspects of our sexual desires, physical appearance, and personal quirks. There is always some tabloid or magazine quick to call out anyone that they feel doesn’t fit in with the trend of the month and any observations on sexual ‘deviation’ are typically treated as just that (or as a novelty).
But strictly-sex hookups defy the conventional idea of what sex and relationships ‘should’ be like. They allow you a chance to radically declare to yourself and others that you are entitled to pursue your desires and love yourself (and others) in any safe, sane, and consensual manner that you choose, and to hell with anyone who says otherwise.
This type of radical counter culture is actually a daring motion of self-love and of general bodily acceptance, and that’s truly fantastic.
Some Final Thoughts
Of course, there are exceptions to these rules. When looking at strictly-sex hookups it pays to consider why you’re actually pursing that particular form of sexual engagement.
I also highly recommend using a designated site, such as mysexhookups.com, so that your intentions are very explicit right from the get-go.
Strictly-sex hookups are a wonderful alternative to conventional approaches to sex and relationships and I can assure you that the benefits mentioned in this article barely brush the surface. For every hookup there is a story, and for every fuck a memory. What memories will you forge should you choose to embark upon the strictly-sex route?
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