Product Review: The Uberkinky Whipped Cream Soothing Spanking Cream (100g)

Perhaps I’m a bad domme. Then again perhaps Mr Peaches likes it that way.

He certainly seemed to appreciate it when I made him bend over, close his eyes, and began to spread the Uberkinky Whipped Cream over his posterior. He enjoyed it even more when the soothing message I was bestowing upon him suddenly turned in to a barrage of spanks—amplified by the presence of the cream, each sting augmented to sharp precision.

Even though it’s classified as Bondage Gear, this is not what the Uberkinky Whipped Cream is technically meant for. But neither of us seemed to mind.

The Uberkinky Whipped Cream Soothing Spanking Cream (100g)

The Uberkinky Whipped Cream Soothing Spanking Cream is, first and foremost, an aftercare product, and isn’t really meant to be used for the actual spanking itself. I choose to introduce Mr Peaches to it in a non-conventional way because I had a hunch that it would add a nice bit of sensation to the actual process of spanking. That being said I don’t suggest that anyone start out using this product in such a way unless you’ve very confident when it comes to your sub or unless you’ve both agreed to ease in to experimenting with different ways to augment your impact play (or, preferably, both).

This cream is perfect for some tender love n’ care.

When it comes to its intended use, the Uberkinky Whipped Cream Soothing Spanking Cream is meant to comfort and nourish the skin after a long or intense impact play session. To this end it’s infused with various different ingredients which allow it to provide the most desirable degree of aftercare.

The full ingredients list for the Uberkinky Whipped Cream is as follows:

Aqua, caprylic/capric triglyceride, glycerine (vegetable), isopropyl myristate, cetearyl alcohol, stearic acid, glyceryl monostearate, sorbitan isostearate, dimethicone Copolyol , Vitamin E (d-alpha tocopherol), triethanolamine, Phenoxyethanol, Calendula

But it’s the Vitamin E and Calendula that are of most note.

Vitamin E is used in a lot of beauty and skin products with good reason. Vitamin E is an antioxidant, meaning that it can help hydrate the skin, alleviate skin damage (such as sun burns), and even help prevent things such as wrinkling. The right amount of Vitamin E used to gain these benefits is a bit of a balancing act, but it’s one that the cosmetic industry has become quite adept at, and it seems like Uberkinky has followed suit.

Calendula is also great for the skin, but acts as an anti-inflammatory as well as an antioxidant. I’m sure I don’t need to explain why this is great after an extensive spanking.

The cream itself is wonderfully thick and pure white in appearance. It doesn’t resemble whipped cream but more the marshmallow spread that you can get in some American candy shops (or normal stores if you’re from America…I’m guessing?).

The cream may not look great but it sure does feel amazing.

Consistency-wise the cream is dense and cool to the touch. It is thicker than moisturizer but more malleable than something like coconut oil (at least in my experience). It isn’t necessarily slick and does, indeed, feel much creamier. When working it in to the skin I would say I ‘massage’ it more than ‘spread’ it and the action amplifies the level of intimacy involved. This is particularly appreciated given that this cream is intended for aftercare—something which it naturally facilitates.

A plastic cap keeps the Uberkinky Whipped Cream fresh and clean and is easy to remove, even if your hands have lubricant, oil, or cream on them already.

This cap is very useful.

Now, I have to admit, I haven’t personally used this cream much on my own skin, but I am now well-versed in using it on Mr Peaches, and he has a few words of his own to say about it:

Mr Peaches here helping to review another product for my dear Emmeline, so let get the whips and paddles ready and review Uberkinky Whipped Cream.

 Now some of us like a bit of spanking, we enjoy the anticipation, the feeling of impact and the dull sting afterwards these things can really get some peoples motors running…mine included but just as important is the aftercare and that is where this product comes in.

Uberkinky’s Whipped Cream is an “after spanking cream” because when all’s red and tender we still love and care for each other.

Now having used this product a couple of times I can say confidently that it works and I can feel it work straight away, the cream has a cooling sensations that help ease the pain after a session (which is kinda helpful when you need to sit down and write a review). The areas where the cream is used don’t stay red for too long and heal really nicely they even seem softer for the treatment.

Even the act of applying it can be made into something tender (though that’s more down to you and your partner than the cream).

Can I come up with any flaws with it? Honestly no. Overall I like this product, it’s well thought out, does its job well and has a great name.

High praise indeed.

As for my own experiences, although I haven’t used this cream post impact play I have been getting it on my hands as part of the massage process and I’ve found that it’s left them noticeably smoother and softer. As part of my lifting routine I have a fair few callouses on my palms but these have become a bit less firm as I’ve used this cream, so I consider it beneficial for both of us.

The psychological element of using this cream is also wonderful, especially considering how effortless it is to apply, and a little really does go a long way.

As Mr Peaches said, there are very few downsides to this cream. It’s even vegan (whoop whoop!).

If I were pressed to mention downsides I would perhaps caution those with sensitive skin to be a bit wary about the alcohol listed in the ingredients (or any other ingredients that you know are a trigger for you) but this is a very extreme stretch.

This cream also has a certain feeling to it when applied to the skin which some people may not like. If you know you’re the type who dislikes the feeling of moisturizer (or any other skin care product) on your skin during the day then this cream is probably going to be equally irksome to you.

But, like I said, these are stretches to the extreme. Nit-picks really.

Final Thoughts

Overall Mr Peaches and I absolutely adore the Uberkinky Whipped Cream and would recommend it to any BDSM enthusiasts looking for a designated aftercare cream.

Not only is it wonderfully effective at caring for the skin but its consistency facilitates the tender mind-set that is coveted during aftercare and puts both Sub and Dom at ease.

What more could a kinkster want?

Recommend to:

People who need a gentle aftercare cream.

People who want a long-lasting cream.

People who like thicker creams.

Do Not Recommend to:

People with very sensitive skin.

People who prefer massage oils.

People who dislike skin products.

The Uberkinky Whipping Cream was provided to me by Uberkinky in exchange for an honest review.