Product Review: The System Jo H2O Flavoured Lubricant Line

If there’s one thing I adore it’s giving a blowjob. It’s one of my favourite sexual activities and, as such, I’m always looking for new and exciting flavoured lubricants to provide that added zing to the experience.

Sadly not all oral lubes are created equal and some can be downright vile. I’ve had my fair share of horrible, tongue-numbing, and mouthwash-grabbing oral lubes and, sadly, it seems that most easily accessible oral lubes do fall short for me in some way.

Because of this it’s fair to say that I approached the System Jo H2O Flavoured Lubricant Line optimistically but with an unavoidable degree of cynicism too.

Thankfully my overall experience with these lubricants has been positive. No, they’re not perfect, and I wouldn’t call them the best oral lubricants on the market, but they do have a certain appeal with is lip-lickingly good.

The System Jo H2O Flavoured Lubricant Line

The System Jo H2O Flavoured Lubricant Line is a series of oral lubricants provided by System Jo in order to add a little flavour to an oral sex session. The collection carries a myriad of delicious-sounding flavours, including Lemon Splash, Sweet Pomegranate, and, yes, even Peachy Lips. My System Jo lubricants were provided at random by Shop Naughty in exchange for an honest review and, sadly, the peach one eluded me, but I did get a lot of other sweet treats instead.

Each of these lubricants are full-flavoured, if not with a few flaws.
Each of these lubricants are full-flavoured, if not flawed.

As you can see, most of the flavours included in the System Jo H2O Flavoured Lubricant Line are fruit-based. This should give them a broad appeal although they lamentably don’t count as one of your five a day. Before I go through the taste of this lubricant, though, and the flavours I received let’s explore some of the other essential specs for these lubricants.

The System Jo H2O Flavoured Lubricant Line is a water-based lubricant, making it slick, smooth, and a little bit runny. All of the lubricants I received were rather thin. This may seem like a bad thing but it did allow them to drizzle and spread over skin very well. This rather thin consistency also meant that there was no goopy reside to content with while I was giving Mr. Peaches a blowjob, just juicy goodness.

That being said I did find that the Tropical Passion lubricant was actually a bit thicker in consistency than the other flavours that I was given. This was interesting but in no way detrimental. It still spread very well and kept things nice and slick during use. I suppose I’m just surprised about the variation more than anything else.

These lubricants are thinner than some but this works well for their purpose.
These lubricants are thinner than some but this works well for their purpose.

None of the lubricants ever got sticky, which is another very good thing about them, and they each gave off a gentle fragrance matching the flavours that they promised. I personally appreciated this as it functioned as a little tease or a promise of things to come.

Flavour-wise these lubricants have been a bit divisive among those who have tried some. Personally I really liked them but some other people who tried them held a different opinion. That being said this is what the flavours tasted like to me:

Tropical Passion: The thickest and most subtle of the bunch, this lubricant still packs a potent amount of flavour which definitely evokes a tropical cocktail or a selection of sweet dried tropical fruits. Personally it reminded me a bit of love heart candies too, which was a nice little flavour to revisit. Compared to the others this flavour is a bit gentler, which might make it better for someone who doesn’t like very strong flavours, but I never felt like I was being short changed with it either in terms of flavour.

Red Licorice: Rich, slightly creamy, and with a deep aftertaste, this flavour tasted like luxurious cherry sweets to me more than Red Licorice. Still the flavour is incredibly enjoyable and I can’t fault it for how juicy it tastes. It’s one of my favourites of the bunch.

Strawberry Kiss: Another very fruity lubricant, this flavour starts off with a subtle sweetness before the juiciness of the strawberry kicks in full-force. Again, this flavour tastes more like strawberry sweets or sauce rather than an actual strawberry, but that’s not a bad thing. It’s a flavour so delectable that I’d actually be tempted to pour it over some ice cream if not for my previous mishaps.

Tangerine Dream: By far the most flavoursome and distinct of the bunch, this flavour brings the full flavour of an actual tangerine in lubricant form. To me it tastes like the most authentic lubricant from the selection and it was a firm favourite in our household. As a fair warning it also has the slightly bitter tang of a tangerine down to an art form too, so people who prefer milder tangerine flavours (or milder flavours in general) might want to avoid this one.

Chocolate Delight: One of the rare non-fruit flavours of the line I was incredibly skeptical about this one. Chocolate lubricants tend to taste terrible at the best of times and I’m not a huge milk chocolate lover either. Fortunately this lubricant didn’t taste like milk chocolate and, in a bout of double-fortune, it actually tasted pretty nice! Likened by Mr. Peaches to a coffee chocolate, this lubricant is probably the most chocolate-like I have ever tasted in terms of oral lube. That being said it is the most artificial-tasting lubricant of the bunch, so avoid it if you can’t stand a relatively noticeable chemical after-tang in your oral lubes.

Cool Mint: Unlike the other flavours this one comes with a noticeable cooling effect which Mr. Peaches definitely noticed and strongly approved of. The min flavour itself is rather strong but not to the degree of being overpowering. Again, this flavour has a more noticeable after-tang to it but the minty flavour goes a fair way to concealing this. Due to enhancing sensation as well as adding flavour this was our favourite one.

Cool Mint got far from a frosty reception in our home.
Cool Mint got far from a frosty reception in our home.

These were my experiences with the flavours I received and they were mostly mirrored by Mr. Peaches, who also approved of the flavours that these lubricants provided. However oral lubricants above all over products are, literally, a matter of taste and a friend of mine strongly disagreed.

When she tasted these lubricants (each in turn) her face crumbled and she grabbed for a glass of water. They tasted, to her, like ‘flavoured medicine’ which she strongly disliked.

I can’t really deny that with each of these lubricants there is a noticeable chemical aftertaste which kicks in mid-lick and lingers on the tongue after use. However one of my fondest memories about getting ill as a child was the fact that I got to have some of those yummy, artificially sweetened medicines, so I suppose it didn’t personally both me. That being said if you dislike that medicinal tang that you get with high end children’s cough syrups then you might want to give this lube a miss.

Thankfully, unlike some cough syrups, these lubricants aren’t artificially sweetened, which is something they advertise proudly on the tube. What’s more these lubricants can actually be mixed and matched to provide different flavour sensations in a sort of oral cocktail. This is a very fun home experiment and Mr. Peaches and I enjoyed mix and matching sensations. Two favourites that we came up with were chocolate orange (of course) and Strawberry Mint. The downside to this is that the flavours do tend to merge a bit, making them harder to detect, but the overall sense of a sweet treat remains.

But, taking a more objective approach, there are a few things wrong with these lubricants.

Compared to some oral lubes I found that these ones dried up sooner and lost their flavour quicker. The taste would be prominent at first but would soon be gone and would either need reapplying or simply force you to go without. These lubricants also contain more than a few nasty ingredients which might make some users steer clear. These include Glycerin, Methyl paraben, and Propyl paraben. If you’ve been around the adult community for a while you know that parabens are generally seen as something to avoid, so users should think about their stance on parabens before trying this lube. Personally as I know I am prone to UTIs and have sensitive skin I never applied this lubricant to my vulva but Mr. Peaches had no irritation during use.

Sadly these lubricants aren’t strictly vegan either, meaning that vegans seeking to eliminate animal-based ingredients in all of their household products will have to find another oral lubricant to enjoy.

Final Thoughts

There’s clearly a lot to consider about the System Jo H2O Flavoured Lubricant Line and it could well be that, for you, the cons outweigh the pros.

However if you don’t mind non-vegan lubricants with parabens then the System Jo H2O Flavoured Lubricant Line does deliver some sincerely tasty lubricants which can be mixed, matched, and enjoyed for the juicy treats that they typically provide.

Sensitivities aside these lubricants are quite tasty and I do think they’re worth consideration. However if you simply cannot condone these lubricants but still want a juicy treat them might I recommend the ID Frutopia Line instead? Sugar-free, thicker in consistency, and 100% vegan this lubricant provides a similar experience but with less questionable ingredients (and, as a bonus, it’s also available at Shop Naughty).

No matter what you chose these lubricants are guaranteed to provide a flavour-filled experience. How you take that, however, is up to your tastes.

Recommend to:

People who like strong oral lubricants.

People who like fruity oral lubricants.

People who want to mix their flavours.

Do Not Recommend to:

People who dislike chemical tangs.

People who avoid parabens.

Vegans (Try ID Frutopia instead).

The System Jo H2O Flavoured Lubricant Line was provided to me by Shop Naughty in exchange for an honest review. If you liked this review then please do consider making any purchases through the affiliate links included.