Toy Review: The Motörhead Ace of Spades Mini-Vibrator

I love rock songs, but sometimes they have an odd moment. You’ll probably know it. It’s that point where the song is rocking on as strong as ever then all of a sudden the singer belts out an incredibly powerful but incredibly high pitched note and you’re left there thinking “Huh, that’s impressive but it kind of hurts my ears too”.

The Motörhead Ace of Spades Mini-Vibrator is the sex toy equivalent of that moment.

Powerful but buzzy to the extreme I know that some people will enjoy this toy. Even I find it impressive, but it’s incredibly high humming vibrations are simply not for me.

The Motörhead Ace of Spades Mini-Vibrator

The Motörhead Ace of Spades Mini-Vibrator is, like its larger counterpart, a very conventional looking bullet with an unconventional amount of strength. Being a mini-vibrator it’s on the smaller side, making it a perfect little travel companion. In terms of particulars it is 3.75 inches in length (2.5 of which is insertable) and has a circumference of 2.5 inches. It’s shaped like a literal bullet—with a long shaft and a tapered tip—and has the Motörhead logo and ‘Born to Lose’ emblazoned on its shaft in silver lettering.

This toy is ready to rock, but is it ready to rumble? Not really.
This badass bullet is ready to rock, but not to rumble.

In terms of material the Motörhead Ace of Spades Mini-Vibrator is made out of ABS plastic making it non-porous, phthalate-free, and completely body-safe. This also makes it compatible with both water-based and silicone lubricants, which will please some. ABS Plastic is a bit divisive in terms of use; some people will love how well it translates vibration strength and how firm it is whereas others will find its totally rigid structure much too hard for them. I tend to fall in the latter category but the silky smooth finish of the Motörhead Ace of Spades Mini-Vibrator dies earn it back some brownie points.

The Motörhead Ace of Spades Mini-Vibrator requires a single AAA battery in order to work. This might deter some but, again, as with the Motörhead Ace of Spades Vibrator, I feel justified in giving this toy the fuel it needs to ramp up.

This vibrator is also completely submersible, making it incredibly easy to clean. This also means it can be used in the bath or shower which will be a clear bonus for some. In terms of controls the Motörhead Ace of Spades Mini-Vibrator has a single button at the end of the shaft which is used to filter through its 10 different settings. These include 3 different speeds and 7 patterns to choose from.

The patterns in this bullet caught my attention.
The patterns in this bullet caught my attention.

I’m not usually a pattern lover but, I have to admit, some of the patterns included are quite interesting. They really do remind me of the strumming of an electric guitar, the tremor of a lightly struck cymbal or the internal vibrations that you get when standing too close to the speakers at a conference. In short they’re not totally generic and dare to present some new variations (although some old classics are in there too).

I actually think I prefer the patterns to the vibrations which were just not for me at all.

Don’t get me wrong; this toy is powerful. It’s so powerful, in fact, that I struggle to think of a similarly sized and priced bullet able to offer such strength. However that power comes in the form of high-pitches, rapid-fire, quintessentially buzzy vibrations. They’re the kind of vibrations that might numb out your hand or cause your nose to instantly sneeze when placed upon it. It also happens to be the type of pin-point, buzzy vibration what makes my clitoris go ‘Yeowch!’ whenever it comes into contact with them.

Rapid, buzzy, pin-point vibrations make this toy a no-go for me.
Rapid, buzzy, pin-point vibrations make this toy a no-go for me.

Because of this I didn’t reach orgasm with the Motörhead Ace of Spades Mini-Vibrator. Perhaps I could have if I meticulously danced around my clit, avoiding numbness and jolts of pain, but I knew it wouldn’t be worth it. Besides, the result of such a buzzy climax for me is usually a painful orgasm and I am definitely not into that.

That’s not to say that the Motörhead Ace of Spades Mini-Vibrator won’t work for some. In fact it seems to be very well-received by others. But, as with all toys, it’s all about knowing your preferences.

If you like deep, rumbly, diffuse vibrations which will take their time and envelop your genitals in the warm glow of an orgasm then the Motörhead Ace of Spades Mini-Vibrator is not for you (though its bigger counterpart may be). However, if you love rapidly buzzing toys that are incredibly pin-point and impressively powerful then the Motörhead Ace of Spades Mini-Vibrator has got you covered 100%. Like the seasoned rock band that inspired it, it performs exceptionally well when catering to the right audience.

Are there any other downsides with the Motörhead Ace of Spades Mini-Vibrator? Not really.

The only one I can think of is that it is rather loud. It emits a shrieking hum which will need to be muffled with music and the bed sheets. This means it’s not ideal for those who value discretion but it’s still fair game for everyone else.

Final Thoughts

Overall I still found the Motörhead Ace of Spades Mini-Vibrator’s power to be impressive but felt like its power went in the wrong direction. That being said the Motörhead toys now balance each other out—with one being ready to rock and rumble and the other shrieking out the high notes—so maybe it was an intentional choice.

Either way I’m totally happy for this product to cover the buzzy market and cater to the needs of its fans. I think I’ll just go be a groupie for the Motörhead Ace of Spades Vibrator instead.

Recommend to:

People who like buzzy vibrators.

People who like small vibrators.

People who like pin-point vibrators.

Do Not Recommend to:

People who prefer rumbly vibrations.

People who like broader vibrations.

People who prefer larger bullets.

The Motörhead Ace of Spades Mini-Vibrator was provided to me by KissKiss.ch in exchange for an honest review. Why not show them your thanks by checking out their site here.