Some Thoughts On: The nJoy Eleven

There’s no way that I can give an objective review on the nJoy Eleven, it’s just not possible. Why, you ask? Well I just didn’t like it at all. In fact I recently returned it to Lovehoney (with no small amount of guilt) for a refund. Granted, I did use that refund money to buy more sex toy swag at Lovehoney but I’m not a big fan of refunds at the best of times, let alone for something so expensive, so you can bet that I sent them some custom drawings as well.

Really, though, I should thank god for Lovehoney’s returns policy because the nJoy Eleven was ill-fitting to me in every way possible, to the point where it physically hurt.


My Expectations

I didn’t buy the Eleven expecting it to be such a resounding failure for me. Far from it; I was super pumped to buy this iconic metal masterpiece. I think deep down every reviewer wants to own an eleven inch hunk of stainless steel, if only for bragging rights.

For me I was sold on the nJoy Eleven the moment I was Jiz Lee and Dylan Ryan use it in one of the Crashpad Series episodes (one of my favourite episodes, as it goes).  When my nJoy Eleven arrived I was in awe of it. I admired it’s heft, it’s sheer majesty. It certainly is a mighty object and I feel like it would make a decent self-defence item too (let the dildo battle commence!).

This dildo's measurements are enough to make one's eyes water.
This dildo’s measurements are enough to make one’s eyes water.

With a length of (you guessed it) 11 inches, and a maximum girth of 2 inches in diameter at its larger end I knew I wasn’t in for an easy time, but boy did I underestimate this toy.

My Experience

The first time I used the nJoy Eleven I decided to be cautious but was, nonetheless, optimistic. The smaller end has a diameter of 1.75 inches—not unrealistic for me—and metal typically slides in smoother anyway so I thought I’d try the smaller end straight away. I lubed it up and went for gold and was right; sliding it in was an absolute breeze. However once in I wasn’t really feeling anything exceptional. There was weight (2.75lb of it) but other than that I wasn’t feel anything too significant nor exciting.

Still, having taken the small end and achieved a passable orgasm (not sensational but not horrible) with it I felt confident that I could take the larger end. NOPE.

No matter how I tried, no matter how much I relaxed the larger end just did not want to go in. I used a lot of lube in my efforts to get the nJoy Eleven’s larger end to go into my body but it just wasn’t working. Not wanting to push my limits too much I placed the Eleven to one side and decided to have another orgasm. What a fantastic orgasm that was. I decided to use the Nobessence Seduction for it to keep myself receptive to larger toys and then moved back on to the nJoy Eleven.

A lot of lube was used.
A lot of different lubes were applied in my quest to insert the Eleven. I kind of resent it in hindsight.

Two orgasms down, a lot of lube, and a solid 20 minutes of relaxing later I finally inserted nJoy Eleven, though some pain was involved. What I was greeted with left me in dismay. The larger end of the nJoy Eleven felt like…nothing. Literally nothing. It was the epitome of ‘meh’. I tried to apply pressure to my G-spot but the Eleven provided too large of a smooth surface to really do anything for me. I tried clenching around it, I hardly felt like I had anything inside me at all. The only thing I could really feel was weightiness. I didn’t feel full at all, it was just kind of in there.

Regardless I did try and orgasm with the nJoy Eleven’s larger end (because when you pay £199.99+ for a sex toy you expect it to give you some amazing orgasms). The resulting orgasm was the most pitiful, gentle, and brief orgasm that my body could muster. It was sincerely depressing.

I wish I could say that was the worst of it, but sadly it wasn’t.

After I’d vigorously thrusted out a meagre little orgasm I tried to remove the Eleven and was suddenly met with pain shooting throughout my body. It was excruciating. Still it had to come out so with time and an unacceptable level of agony I managed to get the nJoy Eleven out of my body. You can bet I screamed. For a while afterward I lay there sweating while my vagina throbbed.

I couldn’t believe it. Inside the nJoy Eleven had felt so small once it was in but coming out it felt like my vagina was going to tear. Even sex toy reviewers can make mistakes and trying to tackle the nJoy Eleven was one of mine.

My experience with the Eleven summed up in a single .Gif.
My experience with the Eleven summed up in a single .gif.

My vagina and vulva were sore for a while after that. I had to take a break from using internal toys for a while and then had to ease my way back in to using large dildos. In my darker moments I was sincerely scared that the pain would revive my vaginismus. It wasn’t my proudest moment.

Still I wanted to give the nJoy Eleven a chance. I knew it was possible to train one’s vagina to take larger toys. Heck, I’d done it before and made huge strides and I didn’t want to give up on such an expensive and iconic sex toy.

When the time came to review the Swan Wand I figured I could use it to warm myself up for the nJoy Eleven. Again, I had misjudged my capabilities. In the end it turned out that the Swan Wand warmed me up for using the nJoy Eleven! After trying to tackle the Swan Wand’s larger end for a while (again after two orgasms with two different, large-ish toys) I went to use the nJoy Eleven as a primer and it’s larger end just slid in with no issue whatsoever.

“Progress” I thought proudly, if not with some surprise. But, again, the larger end felt like nothing inside of me. I spent 35 minutes trying to have an orgasm with it before I achieved another tiny climax. By this point I had firmly lost my enthusiasm for the nJoy Eleven. I sighed and went to remove it only to be met with a severe piercing pain again. I don’t think words can fully encapsulate my dismay at that point.

After another long, painful removal period I decided enough was enough. At the end of the day I use sex toys to enhance my pleasure not to detract from it. Sure, I like the feeling of accomplishment I get from taking larger toys but that doesn’t justify physically harming myself. What was I trying to prove? Those were some of the thoughts that went through my mind before I swore off using the nJoy Eleven again. Everyone has their limits and I found mine. My only regret is that I hurt myself so much to get there.

Of course others may have a better time taking the nJoy Eleven’s massive size. Size queens might love this toy—it’s heavy and large—though, honestly, once it was inside me I never felt full. Not once. All I felt was weight and a toy that was too smooth to stimulate me.

I think in this instance it really was a case of size, in more ways than one. The nJoy Pure Wand is as smooth as the Eleven but because it has a relatively small, bulbous head, my G-Spot is more aware of it. With the Eleven’s enormous head my G-Spot was unable to detect anything outside of a smooth metal surface against it and that lack of precision meant it just wasn’t going to respond. Others who find metal toys more stimulating despite (or even because of) their surface may also have a better time with the nJoy Eleven because of this reason.

Final Thoughts

I know for a fact that the nJoy Eleven works really well for others but, as my illustration says, I’m not one of them. I had enough pain in my sex life when I was suffering from vaginismus and I refuse to put myself through anymore.

At the end of the day I am aware that this is a very personal appraisal of the nJoy Eleven but that’s why this is a ‘Some Thoughts On…’ post instead of an actual review. If you are considering the nJoy Eleven then please do look at the accounts of my amazing fellow bloggers, but, for me, this is one toy that I am honestly better off without.

  • I eventually sent mine off to someone on Toyswap. I think I was more sad to let go of the leather clutch, than the Eleven. I won it in a contest and I was soooo happy. I’d had my eye on it for awhile. It was big and expensive and I loved the Pure Wand. So the Eleven naturally was gonna be awesome yeah? No. It was so heavy that I couldn’t use it on myself. It was so big that I didn’t enjoy it. And like you, I didn’t feel anything awesome. It’s just no Pure Wand.

    • It just goes to show that expensive/luxury does not always equal awesome orgasms. This toy may work for some but I think it’s important to acknowledge its shortcomings too.

  • Lunabelle

    This is why the world needs sex toys in all shapes and sizes, and why it needs reviewers of all kinds too. Two people can use the same toy and walk away with wildly different impressions.

    I’m impressed at your efforts to conquer the steel beast, and glad that no lasting harm was done. While this isn’t a typical review, there are valuable lessons here and I’m glad you shared. Also, that illustration is perfect!

    • Experiences like this certain do make me appreciate the wide variety of sex toys (and sex toy reviewers) that exist.
      Thank you for the complements.

  • Oh man, that sounds bad.

    Now I’m a little nervous! The OH has acquired an Eleven for me and is bringing it with him from Canada in October! I think it’s going to take more than a little while to get used to the size of it. I just hope my experience of taking it out won’t be as bad as what you had!

    It sucks you didn’t like it! But this is a prime example of why Lovehoney is just fantastic, you can try a £250 sex toy and if it’s not for you it doesn’t feel like you’ve just thrown that money down the drain. Of course there’s a lot of guilt with returning it, but this kind of thing makes me value the returns policy so much more. I think we’re so lucky to have it!

    • I value Lovehoney so much. Their returns service is phenomenal.
      Have you taken larger toys before? I think what I really wanted to emphasize in this post is that the pain I experienced was a very personal thing. I certainly don’t want others to worry that this will be the same with them!
      If you are nervous, though, perhaps training with some of your larger toys might have a better outcome for you than it did for me.
      Part of me is sure that with time, patience and a lot of size training I probably could have taken the nJoy Eleven more comfortably. The problem was that I didn’t want to have to endure the experience of trying to take the nJoy Eleven when the end results were sub-par for me anyway. I saw no point in pushing myself into doing something that was making me so uncomfortable just to say I had done it and nothing more. The output was most certainly not worth the input for me.

      • Oh yeah, I understand the pain was a personal one, however it does still make me cross my legs haha.
        I’ve taken bigger toys before, after a thorough warm up, it just looks rather intimidating; yet I have lusted after it for years! The £250 price tag put me off too much though, so whenever it came to purchasing something I’d opt on a selection of toys for that price rather than just one. Due to the exchange rate though, and a discount code the OH was able to snag it for me at £70. Making it a far more attractive investment.

        • That is very good! Here’s hoping that, as you’ve taken larger toys, it won’t prove to be as much of an obstacle for you as it did for me. *Fingers crossed*